Golf's Too Hard - to write about

Ok folks. I think I'm back to my rants. If you're new, please read the older posts. They'll tickle you in ways only your stepdad would when he told you not to tell anyone. That being said, if you have comments, by all means leave them on this post and future ones. And I adore comments, especially intelligent ones (then again, I don't have enough intelligence to decipher from a smart to a stupid comment so all are welcome and encouraged).

These rants are an anectode to the ramblings I have come across regarding the game of golf over the past few years. As I said, go back to the older posts just by clicking on the links on the right of the page. Also, reading them in chronological order makes the stepdad tickling the best.

As for this post, anytime someone tells you they don't play golf anymore, didn't quit due to an injury, and used to break 80, ring the full of donkey dust bell. This just happened to me last week. I was going to a local eatery, looking awesome as always, in my normal work attire. The cook/owner/receptionist/liar asked if I had just gotten off the golf course. Actually, I'm gonna try to paint the setting:
I walk in and sit down.
The jack of all trades screams, "AAAAAYYYYY, diju just play gofff??!!"
I try to calm down his enthusiam with, "Nah, just having some lunch, I'm on the clock. I do attempt golf though, it's so damn hard huh?"
This apparently got him even more excited, "Baqckkk in Brookkklyn (I would have never guessed my his inability to speak) I ujed tah blay goffff all da time!!! I ujed to break 80."
Once he got past the word 'brooklyn' i smacked the donkey dust button as if I was playing 'Whack-a-mole'. I ignored him from there on and put him in an all too common of golf wannabe's.

Everyone has these people they deal with when you talk about golf. It's just a fact of life. It's the 'can you top this' generation where people just have to outdo whatever everyone has. If I told that guy I broke my leg in a motorcycle accident in 1987, which is true, I'm certain he would have had his arm ripped off one time while chasing a warthog into the subway, fell onto the track, the subway came by, hit him in the arm, seperating it from his axial skeleton, only to re-attach it an hour later with a cotton swap and rubber band.

Anyway, you know the type. They suck but we sort of need them just for rants just like this. Comments please.